Foster Care in Germanyįoster Care is currently the main option for gay men. In each episode, Alex and Yan, a married couple and fathers of five-year-old twins, talk with gay dads from a different country, discussing equal rights and options for gay men. So we started, and then in September 2015, after a long, long road with lots of paperwork and talks with psychologists (a process which was really frustrating at the time, but which I now appreciate for the extreme care involved), our son moved in.ĭaddy Squared: The Gay Dads Podcast returns for season 4, Around the World, to capture gay dad options and rights in a post-pandemic world. “I just thought that if we don’t hear it first-hand we can’t really rule it out. “In April 2014 I called Foster Care and asked for an interview to see if this option really doesn’t fit us or we just didn’t know enough,” Kevin tells us. He was surprised to find out that there was a ‘permanent foster route,’ where he can get a court document that affirms that the kids will stay with him. Kevin and his husband were reluctant to go with the Foster Care route because of fears for growing close to a child only to have them taken away.
And the biological parents can decide with the authorities together where to put the kids and most of them prefer to place their kids with heterosexual couples.” The ratio is 10 heterosexual parents waiting for every one kid, and on top of that one gay couple. Also, overall, there are not many kids available for adoption. “They both have been a better match for the authorities than we have, so one of the dads adopted and then three years ago when the law changed the other one could adopt them as well. “I know that there are a few gay couples who were closer by age more than my husband and I and they adopted 6 years ago,” Kevin says. “I don’t want to call it discrimination but it’s kind of odd that we’re not good enough for adoption but the agencies will placed very troubled foster kids with us,” Kevin says in the interview.įoster Care is definitely more common for gay men than adoption. With adoption, it’s really rare for gay men to be selected, according to some testimonials, because of a strong preference by the authorities and the birth parents to give kids to heterosexual families. They did come up 5 years or so ago with a law that gay men can donate blood if they haven’t had sex for 12 months.” For example, blood donation is not allowed for gay men because our behavior raises the risk of HIV, which is, of course, ridiculous.
“We still have in quite a few areas of German law. There was something like ‘written partnership by law.’ “With us not being able to marry we were not able to adopt kids as couples.” Kevin explains. Until 2017 gay marriage wasn’t even legal in Germany.
“Still there are a few parts where I’m like ‘um, we live in Germany and it’s 2021 and are you kidding me?!’,” our guest in this episode, famous blogger Kevin Silvergieter, tells us, “do I still have to deal with that as a gay man?” Not only is there a lack of visibility for gay dads in the media, gay men report discrimination in adoption and the general attitude towards them raising kids. We talked with German stage actor and blogger Kevin Silvergieter (AKA “Papapi”) to get a taste of what it’s like being a gay dad in Germany, and researched options for gay men who want to become dads.ĭespite Berlin’s reputation as one of the most gay-friendly cities in the world, it’s surprising to know that Germany is not as tolerant for LGBT parenting as one might think. Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | RSS | More Daddy Squared: The Gay Dads Podcast looks at gay rights and fatherhood options in Germany.
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